The Hidden Wisdom of Moderation

A recurring theme in the Tao Te Ching is the idea that the sage avoids extremes. This ancient wisdom, while timeless, often feels drowned out in the noise of today’s world.

Rather than accepting life as it unfolds and seeking fulfillment within, we’ve become fixated on external solutions. When life falls short of our expectations, we cast blame outward. If we’re dissatisfied with our circumstances, we long for vast wealth or power to change our reality.

Our society celebrates extremes. When an entrepreneur achieves staggering success, we hail them as a genius and dissect their every move in books and podcasts. When an athlete shatters records, we hold them up as heroes and revel in their greatness.

But why does the Tao urge us to embrace humility? In an era dominated by social media and 24/7 news, extremes dominate our attention. The humble runner-up fades into obscurity while the boastful champion seizes the spotlight. We crave the bold and the dramatic, filling our feeds with stories of triumph or infamy.

This fascination with extremes extends beyond success stories. Headlines constantly spotlight acts of violence or chaos by individuals seeking notoriety. They know our eyes will be glued to their destructive spectacle, even as it feeds our collective unease.

But what if the Tao was right all along? What if the path to genuine happiness, peace, and success lies not in chasing extremes, but in finding balance, humility, and gratitude?

What might happen if we stopped striving to be the next LeBron James and instead became a local coach, guiding young athletes not only in sports but in life? What if we gave up the fantasy of Warren Buffett’s fortune to build a modest, enduring legacy for future generations?

I admit I’m not immune to the allure of extremes. I catch myself drawn to stories of celebrity drama or tales of billionaires and their empires. It’s mesmerizing, but also fleeting—and, more often than not, leaves me feeling unsatisfied and restless.

Happiness, I’ve realized, doesn’t thrive in extremes. It’s nurtured by simple, quiet joys: watching the colors of a sunset, savoring a delicious meal, laughing with a friend, or finding beauty in the mundane. As Michael Singer writes in The Untethered Soul, “In the end, enjoying life’s experiences is the only rational thing to do. You’re sitting on a planet spinning around in the middle of absolutely nowhere. You’re floating in empty space in a universe that goes on forever. If you're going to be here, be happy and enjoy the experience.”

Yet, how often do we trade this wisdom for distractions? We tune in to celebrity gossip or the latest viral controversy, only to feel more disconnected and dissatisfied.

But the more I resist that pull, the more peace I find. When I redirect my focus to nature, a community event, or the happiness of someone else, the weight of life’s struggles feels lighter.

Perhaps this is what Lao Tzu intended to teach us. When we turn away from extremes, we begin to see the greatness already present in and around us. Instead of demanding revolution, we can quietly extend a hand to a neighbor in need. Instead of chasing the gold medal, we can find contentment in someone else’s victory. Instead of obsessing over the world's flaws, we can cherish its beauty.

By stepping away from the extremes, we open ourselves to joy. And in that joy, we may discover the life we’ve been searching for all along.